No one told me 
Growing up would feel this quiet,
That it wouldn’t arrive with confidence 
But questions I would carry everywhere. 
No one told me 
You can do everything right 
And still feel lost. 
No one told me 
Missing people doesn’t always mean 
you want them back. 
Sometimes you just miss 
Who you were with them. 
No one told me 
Independence can feel like loneliness 
and You don’t stop being scared. 
No one told me 
Being strong looks like showing up 
Even when you’re exhausted 
And no one is clapping. 
No one told me 
You’ll grieve versions of yourself 
that never existed 
But felt very real in your head. 
No one told me 
Healing is boring most days, 
No big breakthroughs, 
Just choosing not to self-destruct. 
No one told me 
Adulthood doesn’t give you answers. 
It gives you consequences. 
But no one told me this either. 
That surviving counts,
That choosing to stay is brave,
And that’s what growing up really is. 
Learning how to keep going 
Even it doesn’t make sense, yet.

 
By Saanika S